The Dickless

23 09 2010

In a way, you have to admire Mark Thiessen.  Despite his obvious, and quite real, intellectual limitations, he’s managed to make convincing go of it in public life.  Why, they even let him issue forth his thoughts for public consumption!  Impressive.

But sometimes the reality of his condition is just too much and the limitations of allowing someone like Thiessen to express himself with anything more than crayon and feces become unavoidable.  Here, for example, he’s following the current wingnut vogue for SKREEing at everything the president says, yes, but he’s SKREEing over a pretty clear statement that America is the biggest, baddest motherfucker on the block and everything that you throw at us bounces off like we’re Superman.  Of course, had Obama said, for example, that America is a Mr. Glass-like character and that the next blow was like to destroy our society utterly and finally, well you’d be getting a column about that, too.

Naturally, all of this turns into a defense of torture, and it’s here that our liberal hearts begin to bleed and we almost feel sorry for Mark.  He’s obviously a small, frightened creature.  A soft little boy of privilege living in a grown man’s body and he appears to have spent much of his adult life casting longing glances at the dark space beneath beds.  You really do wish that his editors would take pity on him, take away his pen.  Or, if not the former, then at least the latter.

—Jason

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